Condensed verson of Obama’s speech: “Pass this jobs bill”

Pass this jobs bill* right now…and he’ll tell us how he’ll pay for it later.

Via National Journal, hat tip JWF.

*Technically, it’s just a fact-sheet but it could possibly be a bill, someday. In theory.

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  • Anonymous

    Pass it because I need to kick off the Fall 2011 campaign season !

  • Anonymous

    Baaaahaaaaaaaaaaaaa…
    Gotta do it, RIGHT NOW, RIGHT AWAY…IT’S AN EMERGENCY, as usual…LMAO…

    • B-Funk

      Aaaaaaaaaaaaand, no one’s buying it Obummer.

  • Anonymous

    Baaaahaaaaaaaaaaaaa…
    Gotta do it, RIGHT NOW, RIGHT AWAY…IT’S AN EMERGENCY, as usual…LMAO…

  • Please “Auto Tune” this. God! I love it when His Oneness focuses like a laser, you know, those $2.95 battery powered lasers that can blind you but can;t really do anything else.

  • Pass what again?

  • Anonymous

    This just solidifies why Ace calls him a SCOAMF

  • OK, Scoop, no offense to you at all, but I refuse to watch this tripe. I have heard enough in the little snippets I’ve read and listened to. All I need to know is not what dear leader’s teleprompter said, but by who was in attendance. On dear leader’s side, sitting with mrs. dear leader antoinette, was Jeffery Immelt who has moved thousands of jobs overseas and whose GE corp hasn’t paid taxes. Over in Boehner’s box was Henry Juszkiewicz, who recently had his Gibson Guitar manufacturing business called on by the DOJ jackboots to close him down. They told him if he sends his operations to India, he’ll be fine. Interesting also to know that even India said he wasn’t breaking their law.
    So. Two men, two corporations, two situations, which example is the American dream and the best option for job creation? Which situation cost tax payers, yet created no jobs in the US in one of the worst unemployment downturn in history, and which is a private enterprise, made up of American employees, with an excellent product (which by the way does not leak out toxic mercury if it’s busted) and has not depended on the near empty wallets of US taxpayers?

    Dear leader, again your actions and inactions speak louder than your teleprompter. You are dispicable.

    • B-Funk

      Well said!

    • Anonymous

      Double well said.

    • Josh

      Which one will we choose?
      More bottom up or more top down?
      Let’s listen to the greats!
      Keynes and Hayek second round…

    • Anonymous

      very well said!

  • Anonymous

    Open For Questions on the American Jobs Act

    http://www.whitehouse.gov/photos-and-video/video/2011/09/08/open-questions-american-jobs-act

    President Obama Presents American Jobs Act

    http://www.whitehouse.gov/photos-and-video/video/2011/09/08/president-obama-presents-american-jobs-act

    I like the condensed version better if they could shorten it by another 44 seconds

  • Anonymous

    Open For Questions on the American Jobs Act

    http://www.whitehouse.gov/photos-and-video/video/2011/09/08/open-questions-american-jobs-act

    President Obama Presents American Jobs Act

    http://www.whitehouse.gov/photos-and-video/video/2011/09/08/president-obama-presents-american-jobs-act

    I like the condensed version better if they could shorten it by another 44 seconds

  • Anonymous

    When will we be free of this maniacal being? Tonight’s speech answered Rick Perry question of yesterday: is Obama an abject liar or just poorly informed? It is insufferable to listen to him lie repeatedly, and to project upon his opponents the very tactics he employs. Even his acolytes and the MSM have to hold their noses to carry his water.

  • Mark Smith

    Blue is the new power tie color.
    (Yeah, I notice these things after commenting Santorum’s was pink.)
    Both Perry and Romney had the same blue tie.
    Used to be red. (Reagan) And if you think these things aren’t planned hours if not days ahead……
    Huntsman’s was yellow=squish.

  • Anonymous

    Pass me that bag, quick, it’s in the pocket of the seat in front of you, hurry,hurry, pass it to me now I need it.

  • Anonymous

    Pass it now, don’t worry about what’s really in it pass it now , now. No you don’t have any time to analyze it, what are you racist?

  • Anonymous

    I’ll tell you in two weeks how were going to finance it, pass it now, now, now. Don’t tell me you don’t trust me. Have I ever lied?

  • Anonymous

    Watch my right hand, watch my right hand, don’t look at my left hand, watch my right hand, pass it now or you’re an obstructionist, now, now!!!!

  • Anonymous

    Watch my right hand, watch my right hand, don’t look at my left hand, watch my right hand, pass it now or you’re an obstructionist, now, now!!!!

  • Anonymous

    I WAS GACKING DURING OUR DEAR LEADERS SPEECH LIKE THE TIME I FIRST CHUGGED THUNDERBIRD WNE WHEN I WAS A TEEN…………….UGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

  • Anonymous

    Hi
    Barry Hussein here for JOBSFAIRY
    Its a jobs plan which will make you go BAM
    How many times have you said to yourself
    I need a job and I need it now !
    now with JOBSFAIRY , worry no more
    Give me half a trillion dollars and I’ll tell you how it works in 2 weeks.
    Until then JOBSFAIRY will extract skittles out of unicorn orifices and
    freeze your favorite ice-cream in hell.
    JOBSFAIRY will make James Carville use a brush to style his hair
    and Baany Faank to bend on a chair
    But wait, if you pass it right now, I will send you another reparations bill FREE
    ( just pay separate taxes)
    So for a low low price of just 1 trilliion dollars, JOBSFAIRY can be yours.
    No satisfaction guaranteed and no money back.
    But wait , there is more
    If you pass it right now , MoochL will send her favorite thug to beat you up
    ABSOLUTELY FREE
    So don’t wait
    PASS IT NOW
    NOW NOW NOW

    • Anonymous

      What’s the toll free number? hurry, I don’t want to miss out on this incredible offer. Do I get a Ginsu knife free with this order so I can slit my wrists? What credit cards do you take? Can I give you my Cr. card # right now to be sure quantities are available for me? I’ll post it over the internet along with my S.S.# to be sure I don’t miss out.

      • Anonymous

        Call toll free 1-800-F V K K Y O U
        All major credit cards, EBT cards and stolen Debit cards accepted
        Orators are standing by
        PASS NOW

        • Anonymous

          I’ll need a routing # or confirmation # just in case. And I need it NOW.

          • Anonymous

            Plz route (the money) thru 696969 for bi ( partisan) conformations

            • Anonymous

              Done. OOOO my leg is tingling.

              • Anonymous

                Submission Accomplished
                😀

                • Now back to our “Unemployed Matinee Theater” feature: “Grapes of Wrath”.

                • OK you three, that was depressing but hilarious. Thank you.

      • Anonymous

        Call toll free 1-800-F V K K Y O U
        All major credit cards, EBT cards and stolen Debit cards accepted
        Orators are standing by
        PASS NOW

  • Frederick

    The house will just sit on this football, and run out the clock.

    Hey Obama, maybe you need a refresher course. Your going to have the biggest lame duck presidency in american history.

  • Frederick

    The house will just sit on this football, and run out the clock.

    Hey Obama, maybe you need a refresher course. Your going to have the biggest lame duck presidency in american history.

  • Anonymous

    Congress needs to rip this plan into individual issues and vote on each one separately.

    The house should pass every tax cut and spending cut in the proposal as individual resolutions and let the Senate fail to pass or the President veto the portions that can be agreed upon.

  • Anonymous

    Lets see infrastructure spending that may or may not be needed paid for by taxing the rich. Couldn’t he have said this a few weeks ago? Sounds eerily familiar to how they got Obamacare through….Pass the bill…and then we’ll see whats in it.

  • Anonymous

    Without even reading it too, I expect.

  • Anonymous

    Oh dear Obama don’t you know;

    You are now just a mist,
    Dross to be lifted
    Chaff that blows in the wind
    Fog that lingers and menaces us all
    Your spilled milk the farmer overlooks
    Or even the popcorn between theater seats!

    You mean nothing to us now. You are simply irrelevant!!

  • “Pass this jobs bill, right away.”
    Yeah, Obozo. With all the enthusiasm of passing a kidney stone.

    One of the regular contributors here, Sheri, gave us a new term: Obamacoma. My spell check underlined it in red, so I right-clicked it and ‘added it to my dictionary’.
    Everyone should add it to their dictionary. It’s the only way to describe the brain dead fools who believe this is anything but a ploy to try to embarrass the Republicans. Only those numb above the neck will actually promote, advocate or vote for porkulus 2.0.
    Thank you, Sheri. You’ve added ‘Obamacoma’ to our growing lexicon, the book of the brain-dead: Necrobamacron.

  • Obama was in the mode of Scolder-In-Chief last night. I could barely stand to watch and listen.

    That said, the speech was effectively delivered.

    Now, do Americans have enough sense to see what he’s doing? (1) No possible way to fund this bill! (2) If Congress (GOP) doesn’t vote for the bill, that will stand as a mark against the GOP in November because a lot of voters will say to themselves, “If only…, I’d not be is such a personal financial mess.”

  • Obama was in the mode of Scolder-In-Chief last night. I could barely stand to watch and listen.

    That said, the speech was effectively delivered.

    Now, do Americans have enough sense to see what he’s doing? (1) No possible way to fund this bill! (2) If Congress (GOP) doesn’t vote for the bill, that will stand as a mark against the GOP in November because a lot of voters will say to themselves, “If only…, I’d not be is such a personal financial mess.”

  • cassandra/kes

    pass, pass, pass, in a nutshell. and just what are we gonna pass? wonder how many wished he had passed out- fainted- in mid sentence?

  • Anonymous

    You know how they say, “pink is the new blue” in the fashion world?

    I guess that’s because pinkos make everyone blue!

    Well, it appears that rich is the new Jewish!

  • funny, didn’t he have to go on a bus tour and then vaca 3/4 weeks ago? now we just have to pass the bill ‘got no time for reading it, gotta pass it NOW!’ which crony needs to pay off his mistress this time?

  • Anonymous

    RED FLAG

    Anytime obama feels the need to go around the country and lie to the American people to get support for legislation, we know it’s “trojan-horse” legislation intended to devastate America. obama’s goal: Bring down America, install himself as dictator.

  • Anonymous

    Did Obama concede the 2012 election in this speech?

    Speaking of the skepticism being demonstrated by press releases, tweets, blogs etc. and the current political divide he said:

    “And maybe some of you have decided that those differences are so great that we can only resolve them at the ballot box. But hear this: the next election is fourteen months away and the people who sent us here, the people who hired us to work for them, they don’t have the luxury of waiting fourteen months.”

  • I feel like he is trying to tell me something but I can’t figure out what it is.

  • You must pass the bill so we can see what’s in it..
    Pass this bill so I can tell you how to pay for it..

    anyone else find the lunacy in these statement’s?

    It’s like me going to the Jewelry store saying “let me have this rolex today and i’ll tell you how i’m going to pay for it..”

  • Anonymous

    The master politician is making a clever play here.

    If congress does not pass the moron’s bill, then, come election, he can throw his hands up in the air and say, “It isn’t my fault that the economy isn’t fixed. Congress kept getting in my way.” He can then shift the animosity off of himself and onto (the Republican) congress.

    If they do pass his bill. He will come out a hero for finally getting things done in Washington. Never mind that the economy will be even worse in 14 months, the pundits (MSNBC) will simply excuse the moron – “It will take time for [Messiah]’s bill’s effects to show.”

    (Forgive me for not using the President’s name. I’m just trying to avoid using his repulsive Arabic name.)

  • Anonymous

    what is with obozo and micro management of the economy…the business owner should not have to do something to get a tax cut…how about just lowering taxes and make them permanent for pete’s sake that will fix the economy…for crying out loud..

  • Philo Beddoe

    Seeing Trumpka in the House is equivalent of being sprayed by a skunk.

    Thoroughly disgusting.

  • Anonymous

    I feel like the editor coulda made “pass this jobs bill” into a rap.

  • Anonymous

    I feel like the editor coulda made “pass this jobs bill” into a rap.

  • Anonymous

    How to recognize con men, flim flam artist, and thieves; they are people who say “you have to buy this now.” This campaign speech is B.O. showing his true colors.

  • Anonymous

    A new SUPER-Duper,Laser…..plan
    say it ain’t so……….is this plan 6.0/ 7.0/ 7.1 ????????

  • Anonymous

    A new SUPER-Duper,Laser…..plan
    say it ain’t so……….is this plan 6.0/ 7.0/ 7.1 ????????

  • Anonymous

    So let me see if I’ve got it straight. We should pass his bill to see how he plans on paying for it. Is that about it?

    Doesn’t that sound an awful lot like we’ve got to pass the bill to find out what’s in it remark that Pill-lousy said?

  • PRESIDENT OBAMA IS EXCELLENT PRESIDENT OF THE USA…PASS THE AMERICAN JOB ACT….RIGHT AWAY !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!REPUBLICIANS IN CONGRESS. I AM VOTING FOR PRESIDENT OBAMA IN 2012……..IAM HOPING ALL THE REPUBLICIANS GET VOTED OUT OF OFFICE .