Friday’s OT: Misfit Politics brings us ‘Ask Michelle’ May. 11, 2012 12:34 pm by The Right Scoop • 150 Comments FacebookTwitterEmail report this ad The funniest video you’ve seen all day, brought to you by Misfit Politics: FacebookTwitterEmail report this ad Comment Policy: Please read our new comment policy before making a comment. In short, please be respectful of others and do not engage in personal attacks. Otherwise we will revoke your comment privileges. RELOAD DISQUS AmericanborninCanada Well it was nice to see michellantoinette answering a question from Soopermexican 😉 NEXT! PS- I changed my avatar so folks won’t worry about me so much. This one’s not so brutal 😉 MiketheMarine I liked the duck version of the evil eye. I thought it was quite appropo. AmericanborninCanada LOL I did too, but it did scare a few folks. I guess I’m just not the evil blood shot eyes type 😉 This is my annoyed and perterbed look. MiketheMarine Now that I bought a smart phone I need to load an avatar and get on facebook and start posting pics and things. I’m still too busy with free apps like the fart app and pocket arsenal. It’s amazing that the more technology we get the more juvenile I become. AmericanborninCanada LOL. Too much fun stuff. Yeah, you’d better hurry up and get on facebook! Or I might start throwin’ stuff at ya. 😉 You’re silly… Linky1 Yeah…..What she says……we’re waiting! MiketheMarine Help me figure out how to do it. I’ve got facebook up on my page right now. What do I do? Linky1 https://www.facebook.com/lorna.draper?ref=tn_tnmn Here’s my page. Click on the link and “friend” me. MiketheMarine deleted MiketheMarine Working on it. OK, bringing up facebook on my smartphone now. (Who would have ever thought that was possible) right now. I need you guys to give me a hint how to find you on this contraption. MiketheMarine Deleted Amy LOL – you’re such a Male ;-D MiketheMarine Big time. I even like girls, 😉 Amy 🙂 I kinda figured as much ~ That’s always my ‘insult’ to the boys in my house. I wouldn’t really want it any other way. MiketheMarine I bet they don’t see it as an insult. kong1967 Not mean enough. AmericanborninCanada LOL, I know. I’m in a bit of a better mood now- so they change with my mood. 🙂 E. Lee Zimmerman That new avatar is racist! Just sayin’ … AmericanborninCanada lol I don’t care! Nukeman60 That’s the answer that should always be given when the race-baiters (not you, E. Lee) tell us we’re racist or what we do is racist. It would shut them down every time. 🙂 AmericanborninCanada 😀 kong1967 I like the other one better. We have every right to be angry and we should be. Why not express it? Rshill7 🙂 That was a smiler. My favorite part was where she said “jackass”. Looks like she has the ability to dislocate her jaw. That must come in handy. No doubt sister ‘bama could pop a watermelon like it were a lima bean. Sober_Thinking Wow, I’m surprised Michelle agreed to do that. Huh? What? That wasn’t really Michelle? Wow… sounds just like her… Rshill7 …doing her best impression of Snuffleupagus. AmericanborninCanada She’s good at impersonations! https://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.2417341826342.130895.1035259378&type=3#!/photo.php?fbid=2417342106349&set=a.2417341826342.130895.1035259378&type=3&theater Rshill7 Weeeeeee! That’s a good one. Love stuff like that. AmericanborninCanada 😀 MiketheMarine ABC, Linky and I have friended each other but I can’t find the info I need for you. AmericanborninCanada I just changed my avatar again…. I’m a happy happy ducky! 😀 MiketheMarine You guys are really good for my ego. I had to stop typing on my phone for a few. I am working after all. Typing with both hands is much easier than using a single finger on that thing. AmericanborninCanada https://www.facebook.com/index.php?lh=Ac_Z1CqthOZwez0p#!/photo.php?fbid=386332848074699&set=a.121950174512969.8354.119512491423404&type=1&theater Will this one do? 😀 Rshill7 It says “content unavailable” 🙁 AmericanborninCanada 🙁 Sorry mybear. It was a picture of sitting bull warren… feather and all. NYGino That would be in tents! Sober_Thinking Lol! WestGAFlash Can’t tell for sure till I see her backside…………or how broad it is. 12grace Thanks, it’s hysterically funny! GreenBeretWay The media would never ask any of the questions in this parody.I think it’s awesome that all the manufactured tricks have backfired. Fluke-Exposed as a flake Dog Eating-I would rather have a dog on my Rover’s roof vs. Rover in a BBQ. Gay Marriage-He just sold out for a night at Looney Clooneys house. WAPO Story-Romney giving hair cuts vs. beating up girls,drinking and doing drugs. Seal Team Ad-O got a “Swift boat’ kick in the butt from the Veterans group. I love the smell of backfires in the morning. P.S. We all love happy duckies in the morning. AmericanborninCanada ;-D Mornin’ myGreenBeret! GreenBeretWay I got out of work early this morning so I could spend the day with you myduckie. There I go again.That WV hubby of yours is gonna whack me with a coffee mug,frying pan,rolling pin or a bowling ball. AmericanborninCanada Nah. He might give you a look and get all jealous but he’s a good ol’ boy once you get to know him 🙂 I’m glad you’re here today! Rshill7 Newsflash! Straight from the frontlines of the “War on Women”: Romney unknowingly caught on a hot mike with a female news anchor saying, “Shaddap and make me a sammich”. News at 11. GreenBeretWay Newsflash! Straight from the headlines “War on Heterosexuals” Michelle caught on a hot mike with a Hollywood reporter. ” Obama came out of the closet and ran off with Clooney last night” Joe Biden is now President. AmericanborninCanada Slap me! EW!!!!!!!! Rofl! Linky1 With Bawney Fwank holding up the rear. NYGino Linky1, tell us the truth, are you a successful comedy writer? AmericanborninCanada She’s Canadian with Scottish roots. I think that comes naturally 😉 NYGino Anybody that could put up with the craziness South of their border AND eat haggis has got to have a great sense of humor. AmericanborninCanada Oh heck yeah! Especially the haggis part lol! Gimme Italian food any day! Back home I was manager and cook at a little restaraunt in my home town, and the owner had a dish towel with the recipe for haggis on it. I about lost my dinner when I read it lol! You’re pretty humorous yourself NY! 😀 NYGino ………..and I’m not a picky eater! Linky1 I also love Italian food, my father swore I had marinara sauce instead of blood. I make a mean lasagna from scratch, do a marvelous sausage & pepper combo, and a to-die-for carbonara. AmericanborninCanada My son loves it when I make manicotti, but it’s such a pain in the butt to stuff, but he also likes it when I make home made raviolli, but it’s a pain to roll out the pasta dough when I don’t have a pasta machine! How in the WORLD do Italian ladies do that without it sticking to everything! 😉 I like lasagna. It’s not so bad to make. Linky1 The trick with haggis is NOT to read what’s in it and dose it liberally with scotch. NYGino Yeah, guess you’re right. Drink enough Scotch before you eat and you wouldn’t care about the recipe. Linky1 OK, I’m wierd-I love haggis and dislike scotch. Linky1 I eat haggis…….and I love it. 🙂 Linky1 I’m a blond with a big mouth, that’s closer to the truth. About those Scottish roots-they’re real, the blonde roots belong to Miss Clairol. AmericanborninCanada lol! MiketheMarine “Shoes off and get that butt in the kitchen, woman.” I actually said that to a girlfriend once, just before I lost consciousness, I’m fairly certain that a coffee mug bounced of my skull. 😉 GreenBeretWay Or a bowling ball MiketheMarine Well, I can’t be sure as the lights went out pretty quickly……. …..boy do I miss her. AmericanborninCanada Speaking from experience, it had to have been a rolling pin or fying pan. Both work well 😉 Linky1 or a very sharp tongue! MiketheMarine No, her name was Cicero and was a 3rd generation Sicilian American who used to throw coffee mugs at me. She only hit me once. The other half dozen times I caught the thing in mid air. I have very fast reflexes, thank God. LOL AmericanborninCanada Gotta watch out for those Sicilians myMarine 😉 MiketheMarine Yep, you got that right. I read her grandfathers diary and it read like the godfather movies. Scary. I knew there was a reason I prefer nordic goddesses. AmericanborninCanada OY! But then again, it doesn’t matter what we’ve got runnin’ in our veins… once our dander’s are up, we’re all the same lol! Linky1 The whole woman scorned thing comes to mind. NYGino You’ve got to admit though, the food was much better with the Sicilian, no? MiketheMarine That is true but one week a month was a very dangerous time to live with her. Linky1 A Sicilian-American? You have courage, my boy! I was married to a 1/2 Italian and his momma was just like Marie Barone from Everybody Loves Raymond.” The first thing she showed me when I started dating sonny boy was the flat spot on the crown of his head, where she would cuff him upside the head when he misbehaved. I got really good at that and at times, would walk by him and do that just because!!! MiketheMarine We were engaged to be married and she called it off 8 days before the wedding. Best thing to ever happen to me was the cancellation. Now I play the field professionally. I’m waiting for misses right to buy me a diamond ring. LOL Linky1 I was ready to walk the other way going up the aisle. That’s a story to go with a bottle of something tall and alcoholic. MiketheMarine I want to get married and have kids but I refuse to settle. I’ve been in love, deep and incurable, before and will wait till I find that again. Linky1 Been down that road myself. MiketheMarine Just friended you on FB. Recognized your dog pic. Linky1 All is cool we’re confirmed. Yeah, that dog pic is a classic. AmericanborninCanada My husband is a country boy from the hills of West Virginia… who moved to the sticks of Florida… his ex is an Italian girl from Brooklyn. How did that happen? GreenBeretWay Did you see the story; A convicted felon almost beat out O in WV? They would rather vote for a felon vs. a felon. AmericanborninCanada Yeah, but it actually depressed me that this beautiful country is in such a place to where this could be happening. Sorry my friend… just a wee bit of left over yuckies. I did think it was funny coming from such a blue state though 😉 Maybe things are looking up for those folks finally. I’d love to go there some day. NYGino Like a Leroy Jethro Gibbs head slap? Linky1 Gino, I had to write that down for posterity. Kind of like a cross between Marie Barone and Aunt Esther from Sanford and Son. NYGino I see. They are slight variations on the theme, each with their own little accents. GreenBeretWay What is up with the women? I got stuck with a blind date a few weeks ago that the FBI would have profiled as a serial killer.All the good ducks have been taken. MiketheMarine Come on down to Maryland. I am seeing a primary and have three secondary girlfriends. We Marines are overacheivers, as you know. GreenBeretWay Sounds like a jumbling act on steroids dude. Don’t know how your doing it.Your looking at a female World War on the front porch if they all show up at the same time.Your gonna need Gino as back up with an Uzi. MiketheMarine You may not believe this but I was friends with all of them at the same time and they know each other. The primary knows the others but also knows she is primary. I have told no half truths to any of them. I have a policy of full disclosure and none of them are asking for exclusivity yet. keyesforpres Oops! That answer my question. Just disregard my previous question! AmericanborninCanada That’d be worth watching! From a distance mind you, but still a good show! lol MiketheMarine They all know each other and I never play games and will always tell the truth. If any of them ever ask for an exclusive relationship I will deal with it when it happens. In the mean time, I am single and loving it. LOL AmericanborninCanada Good boy. Never lie to a woman and you’ll be fine. MyMarine and MyGreenBeret deserve the best only, and if it takes a little while- well, good things come to those who wait. 🙂 MiketheMarine On a serious note, I believe that we all agreed to what our mission will be with our time on earth and having a family may not be in the cards for me. No matter, I will do whatever is asked of me. NYGino I’ve got his 6 GBW, I know it’s 4 now but the way he’s going it will be 6 shortly. Proud of that guy. Wonder what his diet consists of. AmericanborninCanada Good grief!!! 😉 keyesforpres Do they all know that you are seeing more than one woman? NYGino Mike, your hero must be Teddy Roosevelt! wodiej I guess the coffee mug didn’t knock any sense into you. MiketheMarine Nah, the Marine attitude about things like that is that the pain is simply proof that you are still alive. When the pain stops, you are probably dead. NYGino Mike,you realize that you have the same basic game plan going as Nfl QBs and military strategists, establish a primary and also have potential secondaries in sight and on mind. Don’t hesitate to check down when the instinct tells you. MiketheMarine Absolutely right. The military teaches that you must always have a plan and that every plan will fail once contact is made so it pays to have back up plans. Nukeman60 Not to jump in on your conversation, Mike, but if you have 4 girlfriends, I seriously recommend that you not get on facebook. If they all got together, you’d be looking at ‘Little Big Horn’ all over again. But then, you’re a Marine. You could probably handle it. 🙂 AmericanborninCanada We’re still waiting for YOU to get on Facebook Nukefriend! 😀 That would be a happy day! Nukeman60 I’m an old dog, but I think you just about have me convinced. I spend way too much time on the ‘puter as it is, but it would be nice to have one more avenue to communicate with the excellent people I have met here. Let me work on it. 🙂 BTW, I’m still getting used to losing the buggy whip and whale oil lantern, so I’m a little slow. AmericanborninCanada LOL! My husband was just like you claim to be Nuke. When I first met him, he told me he never traveled north of the river, south of the county line, west of the interstate. His electric gadgets comprised of a black and white tv, a cb radio and a landline phone. When I got pregnant, he bought himself a beeper and thought he was mr. techno guy! 😀 Now, he loves the puter, has his own e mail account, texts on his phone and is able to take pictures on his phone and sends them to me on my e mail. Facebook is easy- and I garantee, you would find a little community who love you 😀 I’ll try not to pester, but I’ll be a happy ducky if and when you decide to try it out! Nukeman60 Well, let me know if he needs extra oil for the lantern. It’s awfully hard to come by. 🙂 AmericanborninCanada LOL- I’m trying to find us a horse and buggy so I can go grocery shopping lol. I can’t go completely Amish, because I love my computer too much, but I gotta say, they know how to save on gas! 🙂 Nukeman60 I’m not so sure. Those horses have quite a bit of gas, as it is. I’m the same way. I could never give up the ‘puter, not even on my private island, should I have to go there. 🙂 AmericanborninCanada Yep. Give carbon footprints from my car for carbon hoofprints lol 🙂 I like to mess with algore’s head mwaahahahahahahahaaa!! wodiej lol….wrongdoing brings pain. Linky1 “my a$$ says cheeseburger”……. kind of like John Belushi. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y1tFx5xKrSI I have tears in my eyes here……….OMG, this is hysterical!!!!! Must tear myself away from this……grass to be cut!!!! MiketheMarine Hey, Linky, I shot you an email the other day. Did you see it? Linky1 I must have missed it, Mike……shoot it my way again! MiketheMarine Got to find it. You and ABC. I’ll do it this weekend. AmericanborninCanada I just checked and didn’t see anything. I checked my span just in case, but unless you’re sending me stuff for singles ads or bone density- I don’t think it’s there either 😉 MiketheMarine Working on it. Just found and friend requested Linky. Now I’m working on you. GreenBeretWay Hey what’s up here.This is discrimination for those of us that aren’t allowed on FaceBook. So are you all gonna start The Duck Scoop site and leave us in the dust? I’m calling Rev Al and Jessee there will be a protest coming shortly. MiketheMarine I have had a facebook page for 10 years and before today had only been on it a dozen times. My mother likes to have a second farm, which means nothing to you. I have been on facebook more today than the entirety of my life. I am hooked up with ABC and Linky though, so eat you heart out, Brother. AmericanborninCanada LOL none of that now. MiketheMarine That is nothing more than a military version of convincing him to get on board. LOL AmericanborninCanada Someday when you’re allowed, I’ll be pestering you to get on Facebook too, and you just might regret it lol. 😉 I do wish you could now though, but I understand. GreenBeretWay I’m sure I would be more pleasant to look at then the photo you are having to look at of a certain Marine. Clark Gable vs. Clark Kent. AmericanborninCanada ahhhhh…. I could learn to enjoy that 😉 If I’m going to have all my favorite guys on FB I’ve got some primping to do! LOL! But I don’t know how to get the Ma Kettle look changed into a blond bombshell!!! Linky1 Ma Kettle? Oh, come on, now!!!!! AmericanborninCanada close. :-/ NYGino Sounds like self deprecation ABC. Next you’re gonna tell us you have a price tag hanging down from the brim of your garden hat. AmericanborninCanada Almost, I did, but it fell off. AmericanborninCanada Hi NY! NYGino Hi ABC! AmericanborninCanada Have you gotten rain yet? Seems like your side has gotten most of it all week. It’s clouding up here, but we’re still waitin’!!! NYGino You know Florida. It depends on which side of the street you’re on. All around me in flashes but except for about 20 minutes yesterday it hasn’t hit my house. AmericanborninCanada LOL sounds like you’ve got a twin of the bubble that sits over our house 😉 Is_Sense_Common What about you NY – do you FB? NYGino ISC, sorry for the delay in replying, been away. No I’m not a FBer. As I told ABC a while back, being on the witness protection program it would not be smart to be. Ha. Is_Sense_Common Well I’ve checked with the agent in charge of your relocation & he said it would be fine, as long as you kept your exposure minimal. You get a free bottle of Cab when you sign up, don’tcha know? 😉 NYGino Thanks ISC, truth be known though my sensitivities couldn’t take being unfriended should that ever happen. Can I still get the wine? AmericanborninCanada Who would ever unfriend YOU?! I’ll quack their heads! I’ll peck them til they scream uncle! We’d never let them get you NY. 🙂 NYGino Touched. MiketheMarine Plththththththt…….. I hope you didn’t get any on you. LOL Linky1 I’m joining in the pestering too. Just think of the fun you could have with ABC and I pestering the life out of you. Just ask Mike. 🙂 AmericanborninCanada OK, I don’t know when and if you’ll see this, because it’s hours later- but this is for you myGreenBeret. I posted it on my facebook and sharin’ it with my favorite GreenBeret. Here goes: Three Holy Men and a Bear A Catholic Priest, a Baptist Preacher and a Rabbi all served as Chaplains to the students of Northern Michigan University at Marquette in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan . They would get together two or three times a week for coffee and to talk shop. One day, someone made the comment that preaching to people isn’t really all that hard, a real challenge would be to preach to a bear. One thing led to another, and they decided to do an experiment. They would all go out into the woods, find a bear, preach to it, and attempt to convert it to their religion. Seven days later, they all came together to discuss their experiences. Father Flannery, who had his arm in a sling, was on crutches, and had various bandages on his body and limbs, went first. ‘Well,’ he said, ‘I went into the woods to find me a bear. And when I found him, I began to read to him from the Catechism. Well, that bear wanted nothing to do with me and began to slap me around. So I quickly grabbed my holy water, sprinkled him and, Holy Mary Mother of God, he became as gentle as a lamb. The Bishop is coming out next week to give him first communion and confirmation.’ Pastor Billy Bob spoke next. He was in a wheelchair, had one arm and both legs in casts, and had an IV drip. In his best fire-and-brimstone oratory, he exclaimed, ‘WELL, brothers, you KNOW that we Baptists don’t sprinkle! I went out and I FOUND me a bear. And then I began to read to my bear from God’s HOLY WORD! But that bear wanted nothing to do with me. So I took HOLD of him and we began to wrestle. We wrestled down one hill, UP another and DOWN another until we came to a creek. So I quickly DUNKED him and BAPTIZED his hairy soul. And just like you said, he became as gentle as a lamb. We spent the rest of the day praising Jesus..Hallelujah! The Priest and the Reverend both looked down at the Rabbi, who was lying in a hospital bed. He was in a body cast and traction with IVs and monitors running in and out of him. He was in really bad shape. The Rabbi looked up and said: “Looking back on it, ….circumcision may not have been the best way to start.” 😀 See, you’re not missin’ much. Have a beautiful weekend my dear friend! AmericanborninCanada As I read this late at night, why can I picture myGreenBeret as the fiery Baptist preacher wraslin’ a bear up and down hills lol?! GreenBeretWay I believe I would be more like the Rabbi.Cut and run.LOL Happy Mothers Day.We all love you. AmericanborninCanada LOL I doubt it! 😉 Thank you so much my sweet GreenBeret! Have a blessed day yourself! John Bohler My name is Steve….. and i’m Korean. ROFL Amy I’m listening to Neil Cavuto’s show and he’s interviewing a Romney donor (last name Vandersloot – sp???) who made it onto Obama’s enemy list. Apparently, a private investigator has been digging into his (and other donors) pasts. Megyn Kelley also ran a breaking story on it. This guy is angry – and rightly so. This is the same kind of sneaky, creepy stuff that got Nixon impeached. It’s a dream, I know, but wouldn’t it be nice if the House started investigating Obama’s enemies list and started impeachment proceedings??? wodiej E W Jackson. Republican running for Virginia Senate… http://jacksonforvirginia.org/?p=661 wodiej lol..that was good. Floyd Alsbach Oh my goodness 😉 kong1967 Lol, that was great. “I see there’s no ‘speedy’ in your Gonzalez!”.