Congrats Sen. Duckworth for your clump of cells that could be a baby if you choose it

It was announced today that Senator Tammy Duckworth is preggers with a clump of cells that could one day be a baby if she so chooses, but definitely not if she chooses against it.

If-she-chooses-to-make-her-clump-of-cells-a-baby then she would be the first preggers Senator to give birth while in office. I mean, not IN HER OFFICE, hopefully she’ll have at a hospital nearby…. *checks notes*…. yeah that’s it.

Sen-Duckworth-who-could-be-preggers-with-a-baby-if-she-chooses is very much in favor of abortion, especially for the poor and minorities.

She supports federal funding for abortions of clumps-of-cells-that-are-definitely-not-babies and opposes parental notification for abortions of clumps-of-cells-that-are-definitely-not-babies.

She also wants abortions without restrictions of clumps-of-cells-that-are-definitely-not-babies.

So congrats to Tammy.

(If-she-chooses-to-convert-the-clump-of-cells-into-a-baby)

Sooper’s note: The preceding was sarcasm. Of course the kid is a baby. What is wrong with you people. Srlsy.

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