For those of us who enjoy the constant sniping and back-biting of the bromance between forlorn lovers Joe Scarborough and Donald Trump, “Morning Joe” is more of a teenage rom-com than a political talk show.
And it looks like Joe is tired of all the fussin’ and fightin’ and wents to get back together with his cheeto-visaged paramour:
Last week, Scarborough and his “Morning Joe” co-host, Mika Brzezinski, visited the Republican presidential nominee at Trump Tower to rekindle a once-rosy relationship that has turned bitter and adversarial, sources with knowledge of the meeting told CNNMoney.
The three also discussed the possibility of conducting an interview for “Morning Joe,” though nothing was decided or finalized, one of the sources said. Scarborough did not respond to a request for comment.
I imagine Joe choking back tears while he recounted the good times, and Trump looking away painfully as he tries to forget – but he can’t, he cant! – the insults hurled at him by Joe and his silver-haired competitor, Mika Brzezinski.
And what about the sarcastic Trump musical?!!??
Yes, in order to show Trump how much their relationship was over, Joe was working on a bratty mocking musical that would deride the maniacal millionaire in song:
“It’s actually Hamilton meets The Book of Mormon,” Scarborough gushed, pitching his conceit for the comic romp. With Brzezinski egging him on, Scarborough, whose ego is as healthy as his head of hair, reached into his briefcase and pulled out his iPhone. He wanted me to have a listen. “I hope you have no problem putting in my earbuds,” he said, giving them a perfunctory wipe on the hem of his shirt. He pressed “play,” the music swelled, and soon a male voice, the titular character, was belting in my ears:
I’m just a simple man
Blessed with this orange tan
I’m simply titanic
Beloved by Hispanics and Jews
I’m huge
Losers don’t understand
The genius of my border plan
They call me a fool
Then they dare ridicule my huge hands
OK, that actually sounds kinda funny. Joe even posted a song, “amnesty Don,” that he had been working on for the musical on his Facebook account:
So why the sore feelings?
Because ultimately Trump’s jilted lover faced the highest and most hurtful rejection from the turbulent toupee – Joe thought he was to be his BFF/VP, and instead was shoved aside for that cheap hussy Mike Pence:
People who talked with Scarborough about his conversations with Trump say they concerned more than mere etiquette. Scarborough told others that he was providing Trump with everything from policy advice to debate pointers. More important, Scarborough left others with the impression that he believed Trump was seriously entertaining the idea of tapping him as his running mate. “When he was in his ‘Love Trump’ phase,” says one person familiar with Scarborough’s thinking during this period, “he thought he could or should be Trump’s veep.”
But after months as Trump’s cable-news hype man, it became clear to Scarborough that what worked in a Republican primary wouldn’t work in a general-election campaign—and when Trump failed to pivot, Scarborough says, he had no choice but to begin criticizing him. Their phone calls, Scarborough told me, became less frequent and more hostile.
Oh the indignity of it all!!!
But the romance/horror show must continue! So what will happen on the next edition of “As the Trump Turns”?!? Will Joe and Donald get back together?! Will Mika reveal her past indiscretions with Mike Barnicle?!? Will Willie Geist ever wake up from his brain-dead stupor and reveal the shocking secrets only he knows?!?!?
Stay tuned to “As the Trump Turns” to find out!!!!