Dear Mom, I need $18,000 for birth control

While playing in the interwebs this morning, I stumbled across a cache of ecards on  The site allows you to customize e-greetings on a variety of subjects. But this one in the “women” section takes the cake:

“Hey Mom, how’s it going? So, I was hoping to get laid this weekend and was hoping you’d spot me $18,000 to buy birth control. I’ll like totally pay you back.”  SAID NO ONE EVER.

According to Rob Lindeman, a pediatrician, “woman should expect to pay between $5,400 and $18,000 for birth control in her lifetime.”

I’m so glad the Democrats value smart, independent, self sufficient women…


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87 thoughts on “Dear Mom, I need $18,000 for birth control

  1. Lol, this is like asking to borrow $20,000 for gum. Libs make it sound so expensive that people just can’t afford to do it.

    Hey libtards, here’s a clue. You don’t have to buy a lifetime’s supply up front.

  2. I don’t want to get between liberals and their birth control. Have at it. The less braindead idiots conceived the better.

    NOTE: To head off any anger that might think I’m suggesting we kill liberal babies, that is not what I said. Birth control stops the conception from ever taking place. No one dies.

  3. Dear Daughter,

    If you’re sleeping with a man, tell him to support you, or at least pay for your birth control. I’m certainly not getting any joy out of that.


  4. Dear Daughter,

    I have taught you better than this, shop around for the best deal. You can get $9 birthcontrol at Targets. Give up a couple of latte’s every month and you’ll have more than enough to buy your own birthcontrol.

    Love Mom

  5. Jeez, how did we ever get birth control before BO???? There were still welfare mothers. That never went away. I just don’t understand all the crap that BO panders to. Who thought of this, the antichrist axelrod?????

  6. I thought it was something slipped in there by a Tea Party activist.

    Sadly, it looks like a real e-card they put there to help people support President Double-Downgrade, for all the women with publicly-available vajajays who think he’s to die for.

  7. They forgot the signature on the note! I guess this was Obama’s Julia, obsessed with sex, abortions and gender choice of the baby.

  8. Is that a joke or really on Barry’s website?

    It shows the audacity, crassness, selfishness & immorality (imposing on taxpayers) of the attitude for others to pay for one’s enjoyment (albeit for health & irresponsibility), & also the lack of shopping (price comparison), which results in very expensive birth control.

  9. Fictional letter (with some truth in it) alternative:

    Dear Mom,

    Romney says he would repeal Obamacare.

    I’m so glad. I don’t want one dollar of people’s tax money going to fund the taking of babies’ lives and I don’t want Christians and other people of conscience to be forced to pay for abortion causing drugs.

    Thanks for teaching me the ways of the Lord and about the importance and specialness of waiting for marriage. And thanks for teaching me children are a blessing from God!

    Oh, and as you know, Obama doesn’t care is taking away a whole lot of money from the Medicare program, another reason to make sure we vote President Obama out of office.


  10. This is almost as bad as the idiot julia. For being a college educated women with a great job, she made some really bad decisions since all she had when she retired was her SS and medicare. Must be related to joe biden i guess or just the typical government support baby. Grow up needing the government to do everything for you.

  11. Seeing things like this just makes me sad. I don’t want to believe that there are Americans out there who are this dumb and lazy. But, if this is a typical Obama supporter, I guess there are. Really sad.

  12. All you guys commenting, you have no right to provide input on this discussion, because you don’t have a uterus, and don’t know how it feels to be a woman. Likewise, all you white people have no right to comment on any issue related to racism (and by default, all of politics), because you don’t have a grandmother who grew up under segregation. In fact, I don’t want to hear you saying anything at all about Barack Obama, because you don’t know what it’s like to be a black president and the hardships that entails.

    Sincerely (outraged),

    Whoopi with the Jewish last name

    1. So by your standard neither does the president since he grew up in a wealthy neighborhood with his white grandma? Remember he is a mixed president not black and he had none of the hardships really. He didnt come back to this country intil the 80s so stop feeding people nonsense. He grew up fairly privledged minus is crazied socialist mother and most of his hardships came from life choices his mother made. So get off of your trip its horribly false.

      1. I usually use a more succinct retort:

        “You say I’m unqualified to home my opinion because I haven’t a uterus? You’re unqualified to give an opinion because you have no brain”

  13. Thinking about this; perhaps it’s a blessing in disguise. Do we REALLY want whack-job liberal women procreating? I say we all chip in and load them up on birth control pills.

    See? There is a bright side to this story! 😀

  14. Dear Child:

    Mom & dad will be dropping the family coverage option from our medical insurance because our monthly premiums have risen 328% in the last two years. I realize you are only in college but you will need to purchase your own insurance to pay for your birth control. Please be sure to do so as NOT buying coverage will result in a hefty fine from the IRS.


    Your broke parents.

    P.S. – if you plan on voting for Obama, you can foot your own tuition & room and board as well… We’ll be too broke to afford that anymore.

    1. Hi Amy, So funny you should say that! We have Blue Cross- We just changed our deductible for 5000.00 per person per year to 10,000. per person per year, so that our monthly premiums would go down. We were paying an astonishing 1498.00 a month. A MONTH.
      So the change dropped the premium to 807.00.
      Guess what? That lasted EXACTLY one payment cycle.
      I just received a notice saying the montly was going up to 912.00.

      It wont be long before we are back to the 1498.00 price, but we will have the 10,000 per person”change”.

      1. I know, it’s ridiculous. The hubby & I just looked at each other when we found out health insurance was going up drastically (again…) and said, “Obama is sooooo awesome!!!!”.

        The P.S. is only partially a joke… I do have college kids who will definitely be feeling the pinch if we don’t ditch this marxist in chief…

        1. When our son got a full time job, and insurance coverage we were like wooo hoo- we took him off our policy, and saved a whooping 59.00 a month. 59.00. REALLY?
          A stand along policy for him would be a lot more than that.

          1. Pre Obamacare – we had a stand alone policy for our youngest daughter (health reasons prevent her from attending college full time & being on our family coverage…) and it was approx $60/month. It had a high deductible and didn’t cover meds, but it still would cover catestrophic issues as well as her epilepsy issues.

            After Obamacare – that same policy had to include meds and other procedures and it therefore increased to $250/mo… That was one year after passage, I can only imagine what it is now. What was a very reasonable premium that even our daughter could have paid for out of pocket became a policy that most young adults would struggle to pay for.

            Now, of course, she can be on our policy until she’s 26 but our own premiums have increased at the same pace as that stand alone policy. That is the legacy the Affordable Care Act has left us – the mandate to buy insurance, the mandate that all meds & procedures must be covered and the resulting increase in premiums. It’s going to be ugly in a couple years when she’s finished with her degree. She’ll never be able to work full time yet will have to somehow find a way to buy a policy that previously to 2009 would have been reasonable and affordable. We will, of course, try to help her – but part of that legacy is also broke parents…

            1. Wow! I just dont know how Obama thinks he helped….except the totally poor.

              I have severe migraines and I now take a preventative. Its called Topomax. I know it is also used for epilepsy. Anyway Blue Cross wont cover it any- longer for migraines (Since the Obama Care was “implemented”). Its approx 600.00 a month. It really helps the headaches, and has stopped me from having to go to the ER for pain intervention.

              1. I just dont know how Obama thinks he helped….except the totally poor.

                Which we all will be once the full extent of his policies takes effect.

                I feel for you with the Topomax. I had horrible migraines from about age 10 until my late thirties. I mainlined Imitrex & then later Zomig for several years along with several maintenance meds. I only have to take the Imitrex occassionally now, thankfully. They were expensive even a couple decades ago – even the generic forms of Imitrex are costly. Living with a chronic condition or serious medical issues is stressful enough without politicians messing with how we pay for them. 🙁

  15. Let me see if I have this straight…

    I have cardiac artery disease and take Plavix as well as Metoprolol. I also take Spiriva and another inhaler for mild COPD. I have to pay for my own drugs and I have no control over these conditions. I have lived a relatively healthy life, don’t smoke and eat well but nobody pays for my meds.

    Yet, I am supposed to pay for the birth control of a bunch of whores without health insurance who don’t know how to keep their legs closed or install a condom? Excuse me, biatches, but YOU are the ones who are constantly ranting how “it’s your body, you can do as you please with it”, so I suggest that YOU take care of YOUR OWN body. You can’t have it both ways; have the freedom to do as you please and have abortions on demand then turn around and hold everybody else accountable for your actions. Welcome to the real world. The twisted mind of liberals is mind boggling.

    1. Thats the point of the democratic party you pay for others life choices. They can do whatever the F they want because there is a safety net for them. Yet the sane people willing to pay for all of this is shrinking

  16. Keep my tax dollars out of your vagina.

    Seriously, the Left is schizophrenic lately. They have gone from “free love” to “government needs to force people to pay for my lifestyle”. The so-called “safety net” is now nothing more that a hammock in the shade.

  17. This is so phony and laughable that it barely deserves a response.

    All Democrats, liberals, and Obama have are lies. They have nothing else. No solutions, no integrity, no plan (to help America), nothing.

    This is nothing more than stupid and dishonest.

  18. Dear Daughter,

    Get a damn job. Birth Control is $10/month. What are you, some kind of lazy Obama voter? You should be embarrassed you even wrote this.


  19. Birth control pills run about $9 per month. At that rate this person $18K would cover the girl for 166 years. Sounds about right. /

  20. Well, upon reflection, I say we taxpayers should accommodate all women who believe that the government should have the power to take money from some of us citizens, to pay for the birth control of other citizens.

    But $15k is a lot of money and these are tough times, so we’ll need to make it tubal ligation which is much cheaper, more effective, has no health risks and, best of all, it will help take these Statist government slaves out of the gene pool.

    Yup – that’ll work.

  21. $18,000 over their lifetime? let’s take a look at that shall we….

    From a biological standpoint, the reproductive years for women are generally from 14 (sometimes earlier or later) to about 54 (give or take): which gives us 40 years of various ranges of fertility. 18,000 dollars over 40 years is $450 a year, which is 37.50 a month for birth control. That’s not even a tank of gas, and if you’re one of those people who buys a drink at Starbucks every morning, then you’re already spending more than 37.50 a month on overpriced coffee and snacks…. priorities are lacking if you can’t pay for your own birth control. (yes I know the average 14 year old girl can’t pay that much, but if they had… oh, i don’t know… a job babysitting or something, then they could and this would be a non issue. grumble, boo, hiss.

  22. People won’t even take personal responsibility for their own sex lives now. Why on EARTH should anyone pay for birth control/planb/abortion for SOMEONE ELSE that is either too cheap or lazy or useless to pay for their own?

  23. Even at an unrealistic $100 a month for BC pills, $18000 would get you a 15 years supply. So unless this chick is persuing a double doctorate in Nuclear Fision, and Paleontology I think she’ll be OK.
    I pray the day comes, and I pray even harder that I’m alive, when these so called “minority constituency groups” the Dems like to use as pawns to get their agendas passed, realize how they are being played, rise up and revolt att he ballot box.
    If we take back govt this time, we have to be on a 24x7x365 crusade to point out every milestone we acheive when true free market conservative, common sense measures, where redistributive measures have failed.
    Hell I’d have a quarterly address, maybe even a short commercial that simply shows the status of economic indicators. Show the unemployment rates for women, blacks, young people, hispanics. On and on, Shove the facts in their face a few times a year and go around the media which will paint everything as doom and gloom.

  24. Say Kid, why don’t you wait until your married before you lay down with someone instead of expecting others to support your sin?

    obama appeals to people’s greed and covetousness.

  25. So at the $9/month for generic birth control pills, the $18,000 ONLY covers about 166 years of your childbearing years? Outrageous!

  26. This is very simple:

    If you are too ashamed and too embarrassed to enter a store, grab a pack of condoms (and nothing else), walk the the counter, hand the condoms to the cashier, then pay for them, then you are NOT MATURE ENOUGH FOR SEX.

    The removal of shame is the most crippling legacy of the left in the past 20 years alone.

    No longer do you need to feel the shame of handing food stamps to a cashier in front of everyone, so there is no longer any motivation to pick yourself up and break the cycle of dependence.

    No longer do you need to get a job to be on welfare.

    No longer do you have to get a job, period, with 99 weeks of unemployment benefits, guaranteeing habitual unemployment. If I were an employer, why would I hire anyone who has not worked for 99 weeks?

    And on that tangent, I will conclude that anyone who is unemployed needs to treat searching for a job AS THEIR JOB. Meaning they get up early, shower and dress appropriately, then spend 8 hours searching for jobs, preparing their resume, and interviewing. This needs to be done EVERY DAY until you find a job. 99.9999999999% of people who are unemployed and claim they are actively searching for a job spend no more than 1 hour a week on the internet searching for a job. I work with my church to find employment for people in need in south Philly. It is amazing how much work I have to do compared to how little effort they put in to their own future.

    Contraception is a distraction from the real issues of dependency, and how removing shame removes the last ounce of motivation and discipline needed to pick yourself up when struggling.

  27. Here’s my response:

    Dear Daughter,

    Because you have made the choice to give away your most precious gift then with that comes responsibility. I assume that you are asking for money for birth control, that you are having a Madonna moment and want to sleep around, let’s see, experiment with having sex with different men or people. With that little experimentation you should also consider what birth control to use and the reality that all birth control will not protect you from all sexually transmitted diseases. So before you decide to experiment consider this, you will get pregnant and have a baby out of wedlock which will not be beneficial to neither you nor the child. And if you do not believe that it will happen just look around you for the number of women who are left baring the responsibility as mother and father and it is, often times, the women who made a terrible choice to have sex which resulted in an unwanted pregnancy or perhaps a wanted pregnancy outside of marriage. I sympathize with you but while you were removing every article of your clothing did you even think about the inevitable fact that you will get pregnant? Moreover, because you have made the most critical decision to spread your love then you should also make the decisive decision to purchase your birth control and then tell yourself this- I will take the chance and know that you could contract a STD or get pregnant if the birth control fails, and be just be another mother having a baby and not married, is it worth it? And if you decide it’s worth it then you can also determine that purchasing your birth control is your responsibility.

    Love Ya!

  28. “I’m so glad the Democrats value smart, independent, self sufficient women…”

    Well if they were smart they could save themselves a bundle by actually being Self-Satisfying.

  29. No, you can sod off and go buy your own birth control, stop leeching off your parents, go get a job, and stop whining like a parasite that wants victims to drain blood from.

    It should read: Dear Mom, I’m a victim of my own incompetence at being a self-sufficient human being. I am just a lazy good-for-nothing parasite on anyone who’s dumb enough to feel any compassion for me. Sincerely, a typical Obama voter.

  30. Dear daughter:

    Enclosed you will find a piece of shoe leather from your father’s shoe. He says that it is the same shoe leather that he’s going to use to kick your a$$ with, if you ever do this again.

    That is is your mother doesn’t get to you first.



    PS Pop is cleaning his shotgun. I would not recommend that you bring your boyfriend home.

  31. Quick thought: let’s do the math for, say, a generic bottle of soda during someone’s lifetime. At two bottles per week, for one dollar: $104 per year. Times, say, 50 years (though with all that sex I’m sure she’ll be fit enough to last forever….*shivers*) is $5,200 per lifetime. It’s even more if you go with Coke or Pepsi. So the question at hand, really, is why is there a war on soda? Why isn’t the Government funding soda? You could do this for virtually any product–even something that liberals love, like recycled tofu.

    I also am curious as to how long that birth control estimate extends? If you think about it, a woman would normally start birth control at age 18 and end at around age 50. That’s thirty-two years. That would mean for $18,000 a woman would be paying $562.00 per year for birth control. Which, to me, seems a little inaccurate– as I remember someone saying birth control was something like $35 per month. Even still, shouldn’t there be some sort of price if you want to have unprotected sex?

  32. Translation: Dear Mom, it’s your parasite child. As you know I’m a lazy slut and can’t be bothered to take any personal responsibility (It’s not my fault, it’s your for having me in the first place, so whatever I do it’s all your fault). Anyway, being a lazy slut, I can’t be bothered to get a job to pay for my own birth control. So if you forward me a check for 18 grant, that would be nice. Don’t expect to be paid back, this is my body we’re talking about, not some loan. How’s dad? Ha! Got ya! Did you ever hear from him after he ran off when I was born? Your loving parasite daughter, Julia.

    1. Reply from Mom. “Sorry, those people that “raised” you don’t live here anymore. Call that joke you helped to elect to the white house. I’m sure he will help.”

  33. It’s really sad but the thread among all the leftists seems to be, to do what they want but have some else to pay.
    Insurance company got the idea long ago. You want a face lift, a breast implants, well that an elective so … you pay. You get the idea.

  34. Go on down to your local Democrat center. You get your choice of either a 6 month supply of contraceptives or a cell phone. All you have to do is vote their way.

  35. A response to this should be a no brainer and hugely amplified. Like Dear Dad, Mom, Grandma, Grandpa: Obama is raising taxes and fees to fund Obamacare, Solyndra, GM, Fast and Furious. Since I just went into debt $100,000 to get my degree, I will be moving back in with you while I am unemployed. Can you loan me my share of the national debt -revolving open ended credit line of course – to pay for this insanity?

  36. Maybe we’d have less welfare and food stamps if legs were kept closed until a person first figured out how to get and keep a job. Whatever happend to getting married (man / woman) first, baby second?

    1. This is what happens when you take God out of schools; there are no moral bearings. Since the Feminazis began their assault on our society in the 60’s women have demeaned themselves more and more, have become even more of a sexual object and have lost the respect we once had. How can anyone respect you if you don’t respect yourself? Call me old fashioned but I enjoy being a girl and being treated as a lady.

      1. And what happens when you put kids into godless schools and don’t train them up in the way they should go at home.

          1. I meant it as a continuation of what you stated about this is what happens when you take God out of schools, but your taking it as a question came up with a sad, all too often true answer!

        1. You get a huge conflict of interest for the kids. We tell them to obey their teachers and then we have to go and undo the harm they unintentionally cause. This causes confusion for the kid. “Dad, you said I have to learn and obey, and respect the authority they have. Now, you are telling me not to listen to them because they are wrong.”

          The other possibility is the desire to keep doing what we are and continue to expect different results…

              1. Deut. 6:5-7 KJV

                5 And thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might.
                6 And these words, which I command thee this day, shall be in thine heart:
                7 And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up.

                Eph. 6:4 KJV And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.

                And how about this for not sending kids to IndoctriNation centers:
                Psalm 1:1-3

  37. As generous as I have been to my son he knows better than to ask Mom for birth control funding. You play you pay is my motto. Besides, as a Christian, I did not raise him; well, enough said!

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