Situation Room and the Flotilla of Doom

Late last night I received a message from my Spy Squirrel in the White House. This is what he over heard in the Situation Room.

Obama: Where’s Wolf Blitzer?

Sec Def: He’s not here, sir.

Obama: Wolf?

Sec Def: No, I’m Robert Gates.

Obama: Oh, my Ax Man.

Sec Def: Yes, sir. Let me introduce to you. General James L. Jones Retired

Obama: If he’s retired why is he here?

National Security Advisor: I’m a retired general not retired from service.

Obama: Service eh? I’ll take a fill up. (Laughing) I never get tired of that.

National Security Advisor: Sir, there’s a situation off of the coast of The Gaza Strip. It seams that Israel …

Obama: I condemn them.

Gibbs: I’ll get right on that (runs out of the room)

Obama: What did they do?

National Security Advisor: They boarded a ship, were attacked, the attack was serious. The people on the boat were armed. They beat the Israelis with clubs, poles, knives. A few of the Israeli Seals were stabbed. One was thrown overboard. They even opened fire on the Israelis.

(Gibbs walks back into the Situation Room)

Obama: I condemn them!

Gibbs: The assailants?

Obama: Yes.

Gibbs: Which ones?

Obama: The Israelis

Gibbs: Yes, sir. (runs out of the room)

National Security Advisor: The Israelis in a desperate attempt to defend their own lives opened fire killing nine of the attackers. It would seem that the boat was trying to run the blockade of Gaza.

Obama: Why did they do that?

National Security Advisor: They didn’t want to have the cargo inspected.

Obama: The Israelis killed innocent Muslims to keep from inspecting the cargo? That’s outrageous!

(Gibbs walks back in)

National Security Advisor: No the boat did not want to have it’s cargo inspected. And they brutality attacked the forces trying to halt their approach to shore.

Obama: But why did they do it?

National Security Advisor: Probably because they had weapons, or recruited future suicide bombers, or simply wanted to instigate a confrontation.

Obama: I condemn them!

Gibbs: The attackers?

Obama: Of course the Israelis

(Rooster crows in the distance)

Obama: What was that?

Hillary Clinton: I think what we need to do in this situation . .

Obama: Who let her in here?

(Hillary is forcibly removed)

Obama: Blitzer, you still haven’t told me why they did it.

National Security Advisor: Well we won’t know until the cargo is inspected.

Obama: So after the cargo is inspected we’ll know why they killed innocent Muslims. Ok, call me when you hear something. (gets up to leave)

Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff: You haven’t heard my Opinion, Sir.

Obama: I don’t ask your opinion. You don’t tell me.

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Other Tails:

Pusillanimous in Combat Boots

Pigs in a bungalow

The Chicken at Dinner


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